How to Teach Others How to Treat You
Are those around you treating you well?
With kindness? Love? Consideration? Respect? You can’t change others, but you can alter their reactions to you, based on how you allow them to treat you and how you treat yourself. It all starts with you,
Ways to do this: Treat others as you wish to be treated. This sets the standard for how they will treat you in return. If you want affection, show it, love, give it, kind deeds done, do them for someone else. It is also incredibly important to ask meaningful questions about others lives and listen sincerely as they answer. That is, not just waiting until they finish so you can talk more about yourself. If you expect them to (or would like them to) show genuine care and interest in your life, you must first do the same. If you consistently treat others with respect, kindness and understanding, you will be given the same in return. |
Be consistent and conduct yourself in the way that if anyone were to say anything unkind/mean/slanderous about you, no one would believe them anyway. Noticing Notice others around you that act with self-confidence, demand respect and are treated well. Look at how they conduct themselves, take these examples and incorporate them into your tool kit. It won’t happen overnight, but you’ll start to notice that people interact with and treat you differently. This starts when you treat yourself with love, kindness and respect and give that to others also. It all comes down to what behaviours you allow from others. Love and respect yourself first, be aware of how you choose to treat yourself and how you allow others to treat you. Respect Yourself Knowing what you deserve, treating yourself in that way and not taking any less than that from others, is respecting yourself. Body Language Be aware of your body language. This tells others about your self-confidence, beliefs and respect. Stand tall, shoulders back, in a relaxed, upward pose and look people in the eye, not non-stop and creepy, but do not be afraid to catch eye contact, hold it briefly, then return for more during a conversation and all interactions. This shows consideration and respect for others as well as self-confidence. Many people take a lack of eye contact as rudeness or disinterest. Be Confident Have confidence in yourself and your abilities, show others that you are to be respected and treated well. Make the choice to love and respect yourself, do your best, own your mistakes and always be open to growth and learning. These traits demonstrate to others that you are confident in who you are and believe in yourself. Act With Integrity This shows others you respect yourself and them. Own your actions, behaviours and mistakes. Admit when you’ve messed up, make changes to do better and demand the same from others as you do yourself. What is right is not always easy, comfortable or popular, but by doing it anyway you are upholding your standards and setting them for others. Be Consistent Do as you say you’ll do, be consistent. This breeds trust in your interactions with others. If you always talk the talk, but never walk the walk, people will quickly work this out and stop listening to and respecting you. Acting in this way communicates that you are not trustworthy and do not act with your integrity and authenticity. Don't be this person. Know what it is you will and won't do and tell people. Know Your Boundaries Be proactive and consistent in your expectations for yourself and from others. Know your boundaries, be clear with what you will and will not accept from others and do not be afraid to say when you dislike how someone is treating you. This shows that you respect yourself, by maintaining your boundaries and telling others what you deserve. If someone continues to treat you in a way that is unacceptable to you, walk away from them, whether they be your boss, colleague, friend or partner if they do not treat you with respect you must draw the line and leave. The way you treat yourself and talk about yourself, sets the standard for how others will treat you and talk about you. If you don’t treat you well, no one else will either. It starts with changing you, others will follow your example. |
What's the Reason?
Remember that there is always a reason for why a behaviour is continuing/occurring, whether you choose to admit it to yourself or not. Be accountable. Ask yourself, how is allowing this (behaviour to continue/happen) serving me? What is the consequence of it for me? Do I get to avoid being responsible? Do I get to continue to act as a victim? What story is it that I am feeding/encouraging/allowing to be true when I let this treatment by others continue? Think about this... What if you changed your story? What if you decided that you deserved better and communicated that to others? What if you treated yourself with love, respect, kindness and put your needs first? If you live with and act out of these morals and values, others will reflect them in their treatment of you. Who knows, you may just inspire them to treat themselves better too in the process. By upholding these values you will act in ways that you can be proud of and inspire others by your example. Integrity - honesty, acting with honour, acting out of morals and upholding values, acting with fairness, sincerity and being trustworthy. Authenticity - being reliable, trustworthy, honest, faithful, credible, loyal to those you love, who you are and what you stand for. Responsibility/Accountability - owning your actions, mistakes, choices and their consequences, understanding that you have ultimate control and power over your situation. High standards - being kind, considerate, understanding, loving and respectful to others and expecting the same treatment from them. Always acting with respect, love and consideration. We are, after all, in this world and sharing this human experience, together. By acting in this way we help ourselves and others, along in the journey of life. By letting your light shine you give others permission to do the same. If you need some help working out your current behavioural patterns and what you need to improve let's work it out together, book in a Wellness consultation with me (an OT) to set goals and get on track to your happiest, healthiest, best life yet. You will also find this downloadable pdf I've made for you useful. Just enter your email and I'll send it straight to you (and the password to access my awesome free Resource Library.) |
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Here's to you being Happy, Well and Fed (delicious, healthy, inspiring whole foods) and treated as you deserve.
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Have you seen our other posts in the Self Care section? Check them out..
Treating Yourself As Someone You Love
Self Care Practices for Loving You
Queen Time
Checked out our Resource Library yet?
Treating Yourself As Someone You Love
Self Care Practices for Loving You
Queen Time
Checked out our Resource Library yet?